You Can’t Touch My Hair: And Other Things I Still Have to Explain by Phoebe Robinson (Epub)

Description

A hilarious and timely essay collection about race, gender, and pop culture from comedy superstar and 2 Dope Queens podcaster Phoebe Robinson

Being a black woman in America means contending with old prejudices and fresh absurdities every day. Comedian Phoebe Robinson has experienced her fair share over the years: she’s been unceremoniously relegated to the role of “the black friend,” as if she is somehow the authority on all things racial; she’s been questioned about her love of U2 and Billy Joel (“isn’t that…white people music?”); she’s been called “uppity” for having an opinion in the workplace; she’s been followed around stores by security guards; and yes, people do ask her whether they can touch her hair all. the. time. Now, she’s ready to take these topics to the page—and she’s going to make you laugh as she’s doing it.

Using her trademark wit alongside pop-culture references galore, Robinson explores everything from why Lisa Bonet is “Queen. Bae. Jesus,” to breaking down the terrible nature of casting calls, to giving her less-than-traditional advice to the future female president, and demanding that the NFL clean up its act, all told in the same conversational voice that launched her podcast, 2 Dope Queens, to the top spot on iTunes. As personal as it is political, You Can’t Touch My Hair examines our cultural climate and skewers our biases with humor and heart, announcing Robinson as a writer on the rise.

User’s Reviews

Review Praise for You Can’t Touch My HairFeatured in NPR Weekend Edition, New York Magazine, Refinery 29, and Cosmo“A must-read…Phoebe Robinson discusses race and feminism in such a funny, real, and specific way, it penetrates your brain and stays with you.”—Ilana Glazer, co-creator and co-star of Broad City“Phoebe Robinson has a way of casually, candidly rough-housing with tough topics like race and sex and gender that makes you feel a little safer and a lot less alone. If something as wise and funny as You Can’t Touch My Hair exists in the world, we can’t all be doomed. Phoebe is my hero and this book is my wife.”—Lindy West, New York Times bestselling author of Shrill“You Can’t Touch My Hair is the book we need right now. Robinson makes us think about race and feminism in new ways, thanks to her whip-smart comedy and expert use of a pop culture reference. The future is very bright because Robinson and her book are in it.”—Jill Soloway, creator of Transparent“Smart, funny, and insightful.”—Carrie Brownstein, New York Times bestselling author of Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl”Honest, touching, laugh-out-loud funny.”—Kevin Bacon, actor and musician“A must read! So funny!”—Danielle Brooks, Orange is the New Black actress“You Can’t Touch My Hair is one of the funniest books about race, dating, and Michael Fassbender. The world is burning, and Phoebe Robinson is the literary feminist savior we’ve been looking for.”—Hasan Minhaj, senior correspondent on The Daily Show“Trenchant and hilarious.”—St. Vincent, musician“Phoebe Robinson says the things that need to be said, and does so eloquently and hilariously.”—Mara Wilson, author of Where Am I Now?“[Robinson’s] essays range from the political to the personal to the pop-cultural—sometimes encompassing all three at the same time…[with a] highly distinct, personable voice that makes you feel like she’s your high-school BFF.”—ELLE“[A] hilarious yet thought-provoking collection of essays…[Robinson’s] writing covers both serious (i.e. race, gender, etc.) and lighthearted (e.g. pop culture) issues, all with her unique flair. In a nutshell, her book is a grab bag of entertainment and insight.”—Bustle”Insightful…one of the most promising nonfiction voices to emerge this year.”—Essence “[B]y sharing her less sublime experiences with her signature blend of honesty and humor we’re used to from 2 Dope Queens…she offers amusing insights that don’t come off as heavy-handed.”—Mother Jones“Moving, poignant, witty, and funny…a promising debut by a talented, genuinely funny writer.”—Publishers Weekly “Uproarious…Robinson reflects on the annoying parts of black life in America with humor and soul.”—RedBook “You Can’t Touch My Hair achieves the impressive feat of being an accessible, fun read covering some serious issues; half of it is hilarious and the other half (see: the title) makes you think, ‘It sucks this needs saying at all.’”—The Portland Mercury“[a] biting and hilarious debut.”—Refinery29, “The Best Books Of 2016 So Far” “[M]ore like a conversation than a set of essays — one that [Robinson] and many other people of color are sick of having. [Robinson] confronts critical subjects like the historical representations of black hair in media, problematic casting calls for people of color, and which member of U2 she’d like to sleep with in descending order of hotness. In other words, this is not a definitive tome on race and hair politics, nor is it trying to be. It is clear that Robinson’s comedy background is at the forefront of the collection. If she is going to have to have this conversation, she is going to do it on her own terms.”—Los Angeles Review of Books“Raw, authentic, and seriously funny…Robinson clearly is one of the most influential voices of her generation.”—Bitch Media

Reviews from Amazon users, collected at the time the book is getting published on UniedVRG. It can be related to shiping or paper quality instead of the book content:

⭐ You Can’t Touch My Hair and Other Things I Still Have to ExplainBy: Phoebe RobinsonI am a 52-year-old white woman and I have never asked a “POC” (person of color) if I could touch their hair. It’s just never occurred to me to do so. I mean, how weird is that? Imagine my surprise when my granddaughter—a 10-year-old bi-racial beauty—came home from (a predominately white) school recently and told me that her friends all “love touching my hair.” I asked, “why”. She said, “I don’t know. They think it’s cool I guess. Still…it made me feel weird.”That was about three weeks ago. One week ago, I opened the People Magazine, to their book recommendations page, and saw Phoebe Robinson’s book, YOU CAN’T TOUCH MY HAIR AND OTHER THINGS I STILL HAVE TO EXPLAIN. I bought it without blinking.As a woman, I’ve always assumed that ALL women shared—for the most part—the same kinds of experiences. I mean, we have all experienced the same physical experiences, right? And, as a group, we’ve all experienced the same kind of gender bias experiences. You know what I mean; the whole, “stand back and let the men handle this, little lady” thing. We’ve all been undervalued, underestimated and mis-understood. Right? Yes. However, what I guess I didn’t realize was that African-American women have had a whole other set of experiences… That makes me either ignorant, self-involved or just…unaware. Maybe a little bit of each?I want to understand—as much as I can—what my granddaughter may have to face as she gets older.Phoebe Robinson’s book, YOU CAN’T TOUCH MY HAIR AND OTHER THINGS I STILL HAVE TO EXPLAIN, opened my eyes to quite a few issues I never realized existed for women of color. I now know that my Lizzie might always have to have an answer ready for the question, “can I touch your hair”. She might always have to be “the token black friend”. She might always be subjected to stupidity, ignorance and oblivious obtuseness from silly white folka who just don’t get it. That sucks. But, I also now know that she’ll live through it, no matter how awful it might be and be stronger for it.I’m glad I read Ms. Robinson’s book. I appreciate the new insight into my granddaughter’s possible future.As far as the book and the writing within goes… This book is made up of a series of essays on the different issues a woman of color has or may face. As an older woman (translated not-hip, cool or with it), I didn’t appreciate the vulgarity in these essays—especially toward the end of the book where the last chapter was written as a series of letters to the author’s toddler niece, Olivia—this seemed not only unnecessary but also VERY inappropriate. I, too, am an aunt and would never talk to any of my nieces like that—and they’re all adults. Nor did I get many of the pop-culture references and/or all the abbreviations (POC, BPS, OBL, etc.). Again…I’m an old, white lady.However, I understand that the author was just being herself.This is an enlightening and titillating (if somewhat filthy) commentary on our world and the way it treats African American women and African Americans in general. It’s not flattering to white people. But, it’s real.I would recommend it to anyone who needs to see life from someone else’s eyes.

⭐ I relate to each situation in this book because like Phoebe, I am a Black woman. Phoebe is ethnically African American, I am ethnically African American so I understand the linguistics of this book, to the point that it annoyed me. Even when African American’s speak AAVE they are not saying hash tag every other sentence and making played out color purple references. I’m glad for her and her book, but any average Black girl could have wrote this because the book is so all over the place it felt like an outline/diary and not an actual book. One chapter she’s talking about her hair and then the next chapter she has a list of old white men she want’s the sleep with from greatest to least, then she’s talking about colorism, after that there is a chapter that is dedicated to the future woman president; it makes no sense. There was nothing about this book that stood out because every other sentence there was a pop culture reference, pun, similes, onamonapia’s and more name dropping than a Lil Wayne track. This book is for liberal non Black audiences in cities like Portland Oregon and gentrified Brooklyn. This was long form rambling/ranting in my ear, because there wasn’t anything I gained from this, besides 3 chuckles here and there. Kudo’s to her for knowing her target audience, because I cringe at the level of assimilation that she talks about is in this book, but get your check. I hope this book sells because her experience’s as a Black women are very real, this may be her personality, but it still reeks of performatism.

⭐ I am 42 years old and found such a kindship with Phoebe. I’ve seen her show all of once, but after seeing her slay her Michelle Obama interview when she hosted in Philadelphia, I felt that she was my baby sister who shares in the same thoughts, dipped in sarcasm, topped with a side-eye.Phoebe is extremely intelligent and grounded. She is able to articulate thoughts regarding race and popular culture without boring the reader to death. I believe it is because she knows her authentic self and isn’t afraid of what people think. There were some parts of the book that caused me to cringe because I am now an old lady who goes to bed a 9:30 pm, but for the most part I was giving her virtual high-fives at every page turn. Buy it, live in truth, amen.

⭐ I really like Phoebe Robinson on her two podcasts that can often be insightful and full of laughs, but unfortunately I was a little disappointed with this book! I think it is definitely an important read as her experiences as a Black woman are real and valid. But I just couldn’t get into the rambling, unpolished prose. I know it’s supposed to be charming and mimic the way she actually speaks on her podcasts, but it was just too silly. She would start to get into an important issue and begin to have an interesting take on it, then suddenly switch over to another bono or hashtag joke. I’d be like Phoebe, stay on topic! Overall, it’s a fun read, kind of like a light beach book. And really something a lot of white folks should read.

⭐ You know how you read Bossypants and then were like, I need more funny and inspiring memoirs RIGHT NOW? So you read Amy Poehler and hers is solid, thoughtful – but not nearly funny enough; and then you read Rob Lowe’s first memoir and you’re so happy and surprised that the most perfect male specimen ever to walk the planet earth also writes well and is funny and insightful? So you breathe a sigh of release and then Amy Schumer’s memoir comes along and you pre-order it and whip that baby open the moment it hits your kindle and you laugh at some of it but then the book takes a weird and not at all funny turn and you realize that it’s actually a protracted therapy session in which Amy comes to realize that she kinda hates her mom and is pretty dysfunctional and you sort of want to start a GoFundMe.com site for her so she can get the help she needs or at least hire a better editor next time? Well, Phoebe Robinson is right up there with Tina Fey. I don’t say that lightly because I adore Tina Fey and she is a kickass writer and comedian and woman and owns her own life experiences and she can rock a red carpet dress like nobody’s business even though she probably prefers jeans and a tee. So, this is serious business.I picked up Robinson’s book through some convoluted means – it was on a list or in the recommended reads after a book on some list somewhere or just ran across it randomly…I really don’t know. I’d never heard of Phoebe Robinson before (sorry, Phebes) but that, of course, would never stop me from trying out a book. I’m so glad I’m open minded like that because Robinson made me laugh a LOT (even woke my husband up once due to shaking with laughter in bed), but it also made me cry from time to time. AND…it left me a more educated, thoughtful person than I had been before I began. Robinson writes about the black experience and the female experience – one of which I know a lot about, and one about which I know jack, because I am white; even with a tan I just look like Wonder Bread left in the toaster for about 25 seconds. Nada. I grew up in the suburbs of Illinois, Indiana, and Long Island, New York. You can’t get much whiter than that.So Phoebe Robinson shared some BPS (Black People Secrets) and, more importantly, she shared her own life experiences, which hit me like a ton of bricks and opened my eyes to perspectives to which I was so blind, I didn’t even consider to consider them. Her discussion, for example, of the guilt and responsibility to white people that she felt as a young adult about every word she uttered really forced me to reconsider and reframe the experience of middle class black people (Robinson makes it very clear that she is not speaking for all black people, and as a woman and especially as a cancer patient, I totally get that… so I don’t want to make sweeping generalizations). I feel stupid even saying this and I’m sure any POC (person of color) reading this is rolling their eyes and thinking, wow, “Dr.” J, you are a moron. Which is true. But at least I’m trying my best to look beyond my own sheltered existence.Anyway. This book is very well written, extremely funny, and offers some really extraordinary insights. I’m so glad it tumbled into my hands, because Phoebe Robibson, you have yourself a new fan for life. Thank you for going all in and sharing so much of yourself with the world.Now quit reading my review and get to the bookstore or Kindle or the library right away!

⭐ I liked the book and found the author very funny. However, if you are not American beware of the pop culture references! I didn’t get like 60% of them after living in the US for several years, and there is A LOT of them in the book. Either they are obscure-ish or I am out of touch lol. I am sure a reader who was born and raised here would not have this problem, but for me it was hard to read parts of the book because of that.

⭐ I am writing this review as a white woman, well, I am about as white as it gets. I burn if I go outside for more than 5 minutes. That aside, I enjoyed reading this book. Phoebe talks to the reader like a friend, and her digressions were hilarious. I won’t touch on the racial perspectives of this book in a review, but I feel better informed for reading this.

⭐ I think I learned a few things while being amused reading this book. I was already familiar with Phoebe from The Larry Wilmore show. This is the second book of hers that I’ve read. I hope I can avoid doing or saying the stupid things a lot of white people are guilty of when interacting with POCs.

⭐ Phoebe Robinson cracks me the eff up on her two shows, 2DQ and SoooMWG, so reading her book was a treat! Being able to hear it her voice (in my head of course–she didn’t do a personal audio recording for me unfortunately) was part of the fun, and it’s so encouraging that more content like this is finally getting into the public sphere, outside of private conversation. I subscribe to Multiculturalism theory in that the only way to move past our differences is to actually be honest about them, instead of acting like we’re all the same and therefore *should* have the same perspective. Phoebe is insightful, hilarious, smart, and dammit, I wish I’d run into her when I lived in NY–we woulda imbibed a lot of rozay together!!! I just wish the book was longer ;-). Also, many thanks for solving certain slang-spellings!

⭐ But I will review it. I found it definitely worth the read. No, I can’t imagine what it’s like to be African-American but I see the DWB bias in force about once a week so this lilly-white old lady regularly sees corroboration of the situations described for A-A folks. I could’ve used less repetition, but I chose to read it to the end. It’s funny. And informative. But I had to google some of the descriptors. I’d read another book. You go, Girl (capital G intended).

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